Baker's Delight commercials

That's more like it.


Glass rating: Four milk bottles

Let's see them do a conga line around these! Gaarn.

Opportunists

Some may see this as entrepreneurial, some however might think the kitty on the bottom is being taken advantage of. We've all been there haven't we?

Ah, back to work Mondays...

Tankard rating: Three glass tankards

Only five days to the weekend, gaarn.

Free public transport in NSW

NSW Labor's big vote-buying idea for the next 'unwinnable' (my word, not theirs) election is to make public transport free for all. As there aren't enough fucking seats on any train you get on anyway I hope they're fitting dickey seats as pictured above. At least you'd get some fresh air away from a carriage full of stinky gibbering Pakistani terrorists. They really fucking shit me.

Tankard rating: Four grafitti coated tankards that should have been retired from service fifteen years ago.

Gnaaaaarrr.

Every single aspect of this photograph

Honestly, WTF? Dear readers, your thoughts please...



Tankard rating: Six WTF tankards.

Gaaarn. (?)

Fred Durst

"Here's your two tickets to obscurity Mr Durst..."

Imagine naming your 'band' after a circle-jerk. What a cunt.

Tankard rating: One atomic tankard

mainly for crapping all over that old Who song. Gaarn.

Marriage

OMG.

Tankard rating: Four full-strength dark ales

... before the ceremony. Arrr.

Paris Hilton

I'd sooner stick my dick in a syringe bin. Lord knows it would be a safer/less itchy experience.

Glass rating: Ten items of mixed glassware

In a perfect world Paris would be Veruca Salt and ripped apart by angry squirrels, but I suppose glass will have to do. Gaaarn - tish!

P.S. Happy Easter everyone! Drive safe ok?

These two weirdos

Perhaps these two watched too many Dudley Do Right cartoons as children? That's easy parking for a big ball sack isn't it? Nasty!


Tankard rating: Two teabagging tankards

Some surgeons should be shot. Or glassed. Gaarn.

Identical-genre movies released within weeks of each other

So, what exactly the hell is going on? Is there only one scriptwriter in Hollywood who pitches a studio their insanely brilliant idea for a new movie, and then pitches the same idea to the studio next door, and so on, thereby resulting in two or more somewhat identical fillums released almost simultaneously upon an unsuspecting/fucking confused general public?

As if I'm gonna go see either of these turkeys anyway. I'm so over Seth Rogen. Or as Kochie calls him, 'Rogues' (barf). Wanker.

See also: Deep Impact/Armageddon, Antz/A Bugs Life, Mission to Mars/Red Planet, Iron eagle/Top Gun, Dante's Peak/Volcano, Truman Show/Ed TV, Saving Private Ryan/Thin Red Line, The Illusionist/The Prestige... and so on.

Tankard rating: Eleven Oscar-worthy Tankards

No CG here boys and girls. Gaaaaarn.