
We have an old broom out front of Chez Poopey which I use to sweep up the leaves and crap that magically appears on the verandah. I just leave it there in the corner out of the way when not in use, no big deal. However, several times over the past few weeks when I've gone to grab it I've noticed that it's been put there with the handle end down on the floor, bristles up against the wall.
"WFT?", I casually asked Mrs. Poopey, to which she replied, "it's bad Feng Shui to leave a broom with the brush down on the floor." And she said this with a straight face, completely seriously. Mrs Poopey has a university degree. Your fun-loving Captain does not, which is why he has not been clever enough to pick up on Mrs Poopey's bizarre Feng Shui superstitious ju-ju beliefs during our sixteen years of (allegedly) knowing each other.
Furthermore, I'm now aware that our Chinese neighbours have a small mirror hanging outside their side entry door which points at Chez Poopey, and this is reflecting bad luck away from their house to head over our way! Cunts!!
What a crock of shit - they got broken into this year and we didn't. Ha! In your face Feng Shui!!
Tankard rating: Four carefully arranged mystical tankardsTish! What da fruck was dat? Tish!! (garrn)














